The FILMFAIL Awards 2008

Year 2008. A year that gave us quite a lot of good films, some of them setting new trends in filmmaking. A year that produced a lot of new comers who made their presence felt in the industry. It was also a year that had many mind blowing movies made by some amazingly talented people but unfortunately they went unrecognized and were unduly criticized. Today we are going to celebrate those underrated movies that duly need to be recognized.

So lets get on with our FILMFAIL Awards 2008!

First up is the Technical Awards.

First award is for Best Story. The nominations are

-Tashan

-Kismet Konnection

-Golmaal Returns

And the award goes to

SINGH IS KINNG

Hats off to the director and writer Anees Bazmi for writing such a heart wrenching story with such amazing comedy. I really wonder how the hell could he have had three consecutive hit movies – No Entry, Welcome and this. Anyways, moving on

We also have a special award for Best Original Story.

The award goes to

GOD TUSSI GREAT HO!

Next is the award for Best Choreography

The award goes to

LUCKY BOY – Bachna Ae Haseeno

Well, I don’t really want to say anything about this so lets just move on.

Award for Best Special Effects

The Winner is

THODA PYAAR THODA MAGIC.

The makers definitely deserve an award for using state-of-the-art graphics and special effects that made an already brilliant movie even more enjoyable.

Award for the Best Background Music

The award goes to

PHOONK

No surprises here. The only thing that tried to scare us was the background score. So they deserve an award for this.

Next, the award for the Best Action

Without much ado, the award goes to

TASHAN

The award is given only for the Akshay Kumar entry scene. Simply the best.

Award for Best Costume Design

We even have nominations for this award. They are

-Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic (Rani’s costumes)

-Kidnap (For whatever little Minisha wore)

-Love Story 2050 (Only for the aliens, for nothing else)

The award goes to

DRONA!

Well, it had to get one. C’mon, a Super Hero in a Sherwani is such a unique idea! Award-winning idea!

Let us now move on with the Music Awards.

First up is the award for Best Playback Singer.

The award goes to, without any nominations, without any categories of male/female –

HIMESH RESHAMMIYA

Obviously guys, he deserves it! Tandoori Nights, Lut Jau, Hurry Om… oh and the much hyped Ek Haseena Thi – the only song which he apparently hasn’t sung from his nose (which however didn’t sound any different to us) See, he deserves it.

Best Lyrics

The award goes to

ZARA ZARA TOUCH ME TOUCH ME – Race

What stupendous lyrics! Zara zara touch me touch me zara zara kiss me kiss me – Bravo!

Best Music

DRONA

Well, there was competition I must say. But Drona takes away all the glory. Especially that Oop oop cha song takes the credit.

Let us now accolade the new comers who try to make their mark in the previous year.

Most Promising Debutant Male

This is tough. Really tough. So I ve decided we ll have two of them.

The first award goes to (I m sure most of you would ve guessed by now)

HRITHIK ROSHAN –err—I mean—HARMAN BAWEJA

for emulating Hrithik in every which way (except of course acting, unfortunately)

The next award goes to

MIMOH CHAKRABORTY

He deserves one simply because he thinks being Mithun’s son is sufficient to get one. Also for being a part of one of the most forgettable films of the year – Jimmy.

Most Promising Debutant Female

The Winner is

SHRIYA SARAN

Sadly, this damsel was “promised” the most amazing debut in an astonishingly brilliant movie called Mission Istanbul. She gets one simply for her sheer belief that this was going to be her big break in Hindi cinema.

And now, we have a special award. This award is for the most stylish person of 2008. this award is for those actors, who with their wonderful dressing sense, made their style statement.

We call it, The Style Icon 2008

The award goes to

VIDYA BALAN

For giving the world the most incredible style tip. Cut your hair short to make you look younger (I mean thinner). So why exercise, work out and all that hard work to attain size 0, just go chop em off!

Next we have an award for Best Actor in a Comic Role

The award goes to

ASHWINI KALSEKAR – Phoonk

If you haven’t got it, she s the black magic lady who keeps laughing menacingly all through the movie which made us laugh on what we actually were supposed to get scared!

Best Actor in a Negative Role

The winner is

SAIF ALI KHAN - no – AKSHAYEE KHANNA - no – ANIL KAPOOR - no – BIPASHA BASU - no – KATRINA KAIF. Oh God this is so confusing, no one knows who played the negative role! So, lets just give the award to the movie itself – RACE!

Now its time for us to celebrate a filmmaker for his Outstanding Contribution to Indian Cinema. Its time for the Lifetime Achievement award.

And the award goes to

RAM GOPAL VERMA

He so needs this award. So please Mr. RGV, accept this award and start making plans for your retirement. We promise you we will not miss your movies.

Lets move on to the main section.

The first award is for the Best Film.

The nominations are –

-Karzzzz

-God Tussi Great Ho

-Tashan

-Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic

-Chamku

-Golmaal Returns

And the winner is

ROADSIDE ROMEO

The reasons for giving the award are

-Its produced under Yashraj Banner (and they paid me but that’s not the reason, no)

-Its directed by Jughal Hansraj (this was his last resort – from hero to side hero to cameo to now romeo)

-It is meant for kids (we have a soft corner for such movies you know)

-and finally, it has for its credit the worst opening ever for any Yashraj movies.

So we have to give an award!

Hmm, moving on

Best Director Award

The nominations are

-Anees Bazmi (Singh is Kinng)

-Ganesh Acharya (Money Hai To Honey Hai)

-Vijay Krishna Acharya (Tashan)

-Goldie Behl (Drona)

The award goes to

HARRY BAWEJA for Love Story 2050

He is actually writing a book – How to Launch your (not-so-talented) Son (alternatively called – How to Lose Big Buck). A must buy. And a must award.

Best Actor Female

Nomiantions –

-Rani Mukherjee (Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic)

-Ayesha Takia (Sunday, De Taali)

-Priyanka Chopra (the list is too long, but 4 flops, 2 hits)

The award goes to

KATRINA KAIF

She simply gets an award for being a part of 4 big budget movies, with two of them being hits (Race and Singh is Kinng), for making more money than any other actress even without acting. Kudos to her. That’s a rare talent really.

And now finally,

Best Actor Male

The nominations are

-Himesh Reshammiya (Karzzz)

-Abhishek Bachchan (Drona)

-Viveik Oberoi (Mission Istanbul)

The Winner is

GOVINDA for Money Hai To Honey Hai.

He apparently plays a 20-something guy in the movie. Now you know why he wins the best actor award right?

Before I sign off, we have a special award this year for the Most Outstanding Blog of the Year. This award was constituted especially because our fraternity has got into this new trend of blogging, and we reward new trends. So, the award for the Most Outstanding Blog of the Year goes to, no surprises here

Aamir Khan and his kutta blog!

And since Aamir doesn’t believe in awards we would like his kutta Shahrukh to receive the award on his behalf.

Its time for me to sign off here. Thank you everyone. See you next year. Chao.

You know you are having exams when –

-you start reading the newspaper from the first page right till the end (ads and business section included) and solve all the crosswords, jumbles and su-do-kus

-you learn the name and even the spelling of the director of Ghajini (because that s the concentration you show while watching the promos and also cos of the number of times they are being aired!)

-you start playing games on your cell, something you haven’t done  ever since your bought it

-you start getting new ideas to post on your blog (which has been idle from past six months, when you last had exams)

-you start reading everyone else’ s post (starting from AB to Aamir to a friend you haven spoken to in ages)

-you suddenly realize the importance of the existence of GOD

-you start watching serials and even their reruns

-you start getting radical thoughts on how the whole purpose of having exams is so obsolete and how you could reform the system

-after every half an hour you get a call – from nature!

-you start answering all your customer care calls

-you get more fwds (mostly on exams/VTU/engg) from your friends than ever before!

-and you actually forward those msgs to other friends!

-all your favorite movies start getting aired on every damn channel (and obviously you cant watch them)

-you get emotional and emotionless at the same time

-jan 1^st reminds you of C# (or any other subject relative to your field) and nothing else, not even that s it’s the beginning of the new year

-your working sheet/s turn a master piece; they are filled with your name in every possible font and/or your doodling

-you discover new things about your cell phone, learn all the features and even type msgs in Hindi

-nobody cares to wish you on Christmas!

-even frustration becomes contagious

-you spend more time planning what to study than actually doing it

-your friends freak out when you tell them you updated your blog with a new post

-you get irrational of doubts and actually call up your friend to get them clarified!

-you finally realize its time to shut up and study because your friend doesn’t seem to entertain your doubts

To Madikeri

Before I start off, I would like to thank god, all my stars and who-so-ever does this job of managing (and changing) people’s destinies (mine in particular) and most importantly my mom for letting me go on this trip. I would not even have known what I would be missing otherwise. Oh ya! Even Moni Ok. Now that I m done with my acknowledgments let me get on with my looong account on my ‘trip to Madikeri’. Sorry guys, I know my posts are only getting longer but this one needs all that space. 4 days! It’s been a week now and I m still in a trance!

Anyway we were 13 of us. We were put up in Moni’s uncle’s house in a place  (nice place in that )called Kumbur, about 15 kms from Madikeri. Basically there s a home stay apart from his house and an estate and we were put up there.

DAY 1:

We left on Thursday morning with 6 of us (that’s pai, rady, kar, vinod, soumya n me) joining the rest (moni, radh, sup, kuku, vinyas, rama, suhas) on mysore road. The journey was exhilarating as photo sessions, antakshari’s and (of course) Karthik’s pjs accompanied us. In fact we were very surprised when the driver announced that we ve reached Kushalanagar.

the golden temple

The Golden Buddha Temple, Tibetan Monastery – that was our first place of visit. Those of you who ve been there would know that it’s one of the most beautiful and well maintained temples. Very serene. Though I must say we did our bit in spoiling the serenity We had more photo sessions – some of them memorable (like the dustbin pic, moni and Tibetan lady pic etc )

the 'dustbin pic'! all of us

Next we headed straight towards Monica’s uncle’s home. We spent some time there (with moni showing us around the 70 year old house built by her grand father and not to mention Karthik irritating me with the torch light) before we had our dinner. I cannot help but mention the ‘V’ joke over the dinner table but don’t ask me for more details!

view from our home stay

We then went to our home stay, played cards until the current left us and then Vinod started with his ghost stories. The best one being – a guy who went on a trip with his friends; there was no current so he took a torch to the loo and got scared on seeing his own reflection in the mirror! No points for guessing who the guy was The stories continued till almost 4 when we guys finally slept.

DAY 2:

Our day started a little late, thanks to the rains. We first went to Chiklihole reservoir. (How do you remember Chikli? Simple. Chikli = chikki + chakli! We are masterminds in our own rights!) It’s a very cute place. There s this thing – it’s a depression or whatever it is (see the pic and make a decision yourself); it’s a jaara bande look-alike basically and me and sup badly wanted to slide down through it!

at chiklihole reservoir

From there we went to Madikeri proper, had lunch in Rajdarshan. Reasonable, in taste I mean not in rates! (I m going to forgive them for that disaster called Tomato soup.) After lunch we went to Abbey Falls. The funniest part was sup running away from leeches! Though kuku did get attacked by one. And Abbey falls is sewage water! Fine. Whatever. Next, we went to Omkareshwara temple, Madikeri fort and the museum attached to it and Raja seat. And then back to our home.

Oh btw, did I tell you what rather who gave us company through the journey? Mr. Jaggesh! There was this cd which had some of Jaggu’s best (yea, you read it right – BEST!) scenes from various movies. If anybody ever asked you what’s the height of grossness then here’s my suggestion – give that person a copy of this cd! I swear! For instance, there s a scene where in he happens to come in contact with a woman, and he goes – Touching Touching Touching! . It took us a while to come out of it! Moni is still not out of this I know! Anyway, TTT kind of became the tagline of our trip. Every word uttered from then on had an ‘ing’ added to it and would get repeated three times!

In the night we played dumb charades. This, in my opinion was the highlight of the trip. It was the most fun filled DC I ve been a part of. It was fun to give movie names (I gave some mean ones! Or so they said!;) ), enact them, guess them and most importantly see others enacting them.

DAY 3:

Our day typically started with a phone call waking us up but each one lazy to pick it up! But almost all of us woke up with a start when we heard the time was 9! Again we started late (even the rains added to the delay). We first went to Harangi dam. Next up was lunch at a place called Top in Town hotel. (Seriously I don’t think it can get tackier than this!) Anyway, here s where we made our second mistake/blunder (I would like to exclude myself from the ‘we’ cos I was strictly against it) – we ordered Tomato soup again! This time, all of us! CAUTION: NEVER order for tomato soups anywhere close to Madikeri. Never. And to think tomato soup is the one of the two things with “tomato” attached to it that I eat! (drink whatever) Rest of the food was quite bearable though.

harangi

We then went to Kaveri Nisargadama. Couldn’t do much there cos it was continuously raining. But I must mention the uncle who was so impressed by kuku’s bravery why? Cos she climbed a tree! I think, I think he had a groom-in-the-making son! Hmmm! Who knows?! Right! I did tell kuku to take his number, it might have help any of us if not her; but sad, she didn’t. Lol!

Back in our home stay, radh taught vinyas how to dance. It was kind of cute. Then we all jigged for a while. (Except kar who declared that he was Pappu) Then kar took over and did some amazing imitation of lecturers and friends. Later we played DC again, this time – songs. It was fun but not as great as the previous day.

DAY 4:

The final day of our trip. It took us a while to come to terms with reality. We packed and left our home stay straight to moni’s dad’s estate. It’s a nice place. We had a good walk around the estate. We found a small cute lil tortoise over there. As usual we scared the hell out of the small thing! We even found a snake. It went right in front of us. That’s the closest I ve been to a real snake! After having lunch at a canteen (which was quite good ) we went to KRS dam. We went a little early as the lights were not on yet. Anyway we just had a walk around the fountains, ate jola or should I say, tested the strength of our teeth. (They are strong!) Oh, we (rather rama) even went to the aquarium looking for tiger shark. He was MAJORLY disappointed as the tiger shark was not the kind of tiger sharks he was looking for or something like that.

at KRS

From KRS it was back to our city Bengalooru. We stopped midway for dinner at Indradhanush. Tomato soup WAS good here! But we didn’t order it. You may have had rotis which are rubbery but ever knew that plastic is indeed used to make them? Well we had a first hand experience! Radh’s roti had a plastic piece in it! She took time to digest the very fact, forget the roti!

And then, it came to an end. 4 days of fun came to an end. We came back to our respective habitats. But those four days were amazing! As I said I m yet to come out of it! Well, this is the least I could write. I would love to go on and on but in the interest of humanity (that is assuming that people who read this are all humans ) I would like to sign off here

8th of Aug

The entire world seems to be waiting for Aug 8^th. China is; I know this for a fact. And my friends too. No it’s not the Olympics no. We are hardly bothered about sporting events in which India doesn’t return home a winner. India winning a bronze is made such a big deal of, but does any one give a damn? No! Bring cricket to Olympics then we ll show some interest .

Anyway my point is Aug 8^th seems to have become such an important date and everyone’s waiting for it. Seriously I never knew reopen date of college would seem to be of so much significance. It must be, cos my friends keep chanting it! Strange, isn’t it? We are on our vacations and all we can’t think of is our college reopening day. Come to think of it, we didn’t even bother to check when the college is gonna start again when our exams got over! And now all we want is our college to reopen. Do we really so badly want to get back to college? I don’t think so. Heck, who would want to sit in the same old classes pointlessly staring at same old lecturers and doing the same old thing with the same old question in our minds – What the hell is happening? NO one! I can already see myself on first day of new sem sitting in the class yawning just five minutes into the class. I can also see my friends groaning and moaning because the semester has quite literally KICK started. The whole point of waiting for college to reopen seems pointless. So then why so much fuss about getting back to college? As I was talking to my friends all we want to do is come to college, sit in the canteen, chat with friends, go out and then go home. Yeah, that’s fun right?! Anyone reading this would be nodding vigorously now .

But this brings a thought- are we so very fickle minded? When it is college we want holidays, when it is holidays we want college. Again, no, I don’t think so. Basically the thing is we are BORED; we are so bloody bored of everything and anything. We are bored of college, bored of classes, labs, internals, certainly bored of exams (!), and now vacations too! What do we actually want then? This, I do not know. Still trying to find an answer.

Anyway what point am I trying to drive home? I do not know this either! Confused souls – That s what we are. Yea. But that’s not something we were born as, that’s what we have been reduced to.

Cli-ché

How many movies have we come across in our lives which have the same scenes, same lines and same situations? Many would be the unanimous answer. I have tried to bring out some of them in this post. Hope you enjoy reading them as much as you would dread watching them

“Rukh jao, yeh shaadi nahi ho sakti!”

Marriages and Hindi movies make an inseparable combination. In fact, I may even exaggerate that Hindi cinema is married to marriages. And the drama that comes along – it is the dahej. Marriages are the most common and most over-used scenes in Bollywood. The grand sets, Manish Malhotra costumes, song-and-dance sequences – everything are part and parcel of marriages. And of course the drama! Indeed, our heroines are the most self sacrificing creatures on earth. Our heroine loves someone but is marrying someone else. Why? Inherent drama you see! Of course she has to end up with our beloved hero. How?

1) She realizes on the day of her marriage that she loves him to death and cannot live without him.

2) Or the other guy realizes how much our heroine loves our hero and sacrifices his love for her.

3) Or, our hero uses the “rukh jao…” line and bashes up the other guy (that is the other guy is a meano in this case) and saves (read wins) our heroine.

4) Oh! There could be a divine intervention too… that somehow prevents the marriage from happening… somehow.

All this, ON THE DAY of the marriage!

Well as if marriages were not enough, the airport scenes aren’t any far behind. Again, our dukhyaari heroine is going out of country – most of the times to Amarika. That too in broad daylight! Why? Because our hero doesn’t reciprocate her love/her mean father wants her to stay away from our hero. Of course our hero does realize her love for him and dashes towards the airport only to be confronted with huge traffic jams or some gunda whom he had beaten up centuries ago. What the gunda was doing all these days no one wonders! Or, he could get caught for breaking the traffic rules. Really, our police become alert only on such situations! But, the policeman turns a Samaritan and helps our hero make it to the airport just in time. Of course the hurdles don’t just end there. He has to wade to the security, plead them with the “Yeh meri zindagi ka sawaal hai” dialogue and finally after some more drama wins the heroine. Finally! That would be our sentiments too. Only, it would be because the movie has finally come to an end.

Even Jaane tu ya jaane na wasn’t spared of this airport drama. Hey c’mon, it was fun! You may say. I’d say sure but I have just one question to ask. In this world of technology, why the hell did he not simply make a phone call to her instead of running around like crazy? That too when she carried a phone and I m quite sure our airports are well equipped with phone booths. (No offence, I liked the movie too, but then… I can never stop getting critical. )

Next in line are the hospitals/doctors/patients – usually less mocked but equally cliché. “Mubarak ho! Aapki beti maa ban ne waali hai”. Rings the bell? Our Hindi cinema doctors are most intelligent. They come with just a stethoscope and a doctor’s kit but can tell if the woman is pregnant just by checking her pulse!

Other common lines include those from patient’s kith like “Doctor saab, mere bete ko bacha lijiye doctor saab *weeping**begging**pleading*”, or “Aap operation ki tayyari shuru kijiye doctor saab, main paison ka intezam kardunga”; or from a doctor who removes his spectacles and starts “Mere professional career mein maine aise kahi cases dekhe hai jaha pe mareez…”, or “Humne apni poori koshish ki hai, ab sab uparwale ke haath mein hai”.

But I would say the crown goes to the most ripped (and then raped) scene used by majority of serials and movies alike – Our heroine brings a bleeding, unconscious hero to the hospital, who apparently got into this state trying to save our heroine (cliché, did we say?); the doctor comes in and says “Dekhiye, yeh pulis (police) ka maamla hai. Jab tak pulis nahi aa jaati hum kuch nahi kar sakte”; and the heroine holds his collar/begs him/convinces him – somehow our hero gets operated. Next, the father and grandmother (yes, all rich Hindi heroes have grandmothers) of our hero come running along tensed and the doctor assures them –“Ghabrane ki koi baat nahi aapka bta bilkul teekh hai, aap jab chaahe use ghar le jaa sakte hai” (He is shown in the ICU the previous minute and the very next minute he is alright and ready to be sent home!) The father gets all thankful with the usual “Main aapka shukriya ada kaise karu doctor saab?” and the doc says, “Shukriyada karma hi hai to is ladki ka kijiye jisne naa hi sahi waqt pe aapke bete ko yaha leke aayi balki mujhe mera farz bhi yaad diladiya.” Of course our heroine wins the heart of the grandmother who hugs her, kisses her etc etc and then they all jump to a song-and-dance like one happy family.

Well, I could go on and on and on and write a book! But! Just when you think this is the end of my blog – it’s my turn to get cliché – wait for the sequel

Past 3 weeks of my Life

************************************************

One week before exams

************************************************

“Hey! What you doing? Started studying? ”

“Nah, not yet. No mood! I ve been watching movies since morning How about you?”

“Ya, started with SE. Finished one chapter. Its too horrible! So much is there to study!”

**Oh crap! I should start now!**

————————————————————————————————

“Hey what you doing?”

“Doing SE ya. It just doesn’t move forward. Beligge inda 3^rd chapter itkondidini innu mugdilve! Yesterday I did one chapter in CG. What about you?”

“Haven’t started anything yet. Btw got my message about the placements dates?”

“Ya got it. No time to think of placements now. First exam mugili”

“I m not bothered about exams. I m more worried about placements. They are more important.”

“Ya! But dear! You need to clear your exams as well!”

**Ya ya right!**

“Anyway start studying. There s not enough time left!”

**Hmmmmm… Do the most dreaded thing… Well no other choice!**

————————————————————————————————

“How are you studying for CG?”

“How andre?”

“I mean which book? Local or prescribed?”

“I have both I ll do from both I guess. Depends. Haven’t decided yet.”

“I m finding prescribed too difficult to read.”

“Well, it is easy but you can go for local also. No prob”

**Man! Now I should “start looking” for VTU book!**

“Hey do you have CG local book?”

“Yup I do ”

“Fine then, I m anyway coming to college tomorrow, I ll take it from you and get it xeroxed.”

“Ya sure but why college?”

“Combined SHtudying No, actually I need to learn SSM. Dunno even a single problem in it!”

**true engineering student! 5 days before exam you get a textbook xeroxed!**

————————————————————————————————

“So, done with SE?”

“Ayyo kelbeda! From past 2 days I ve done just 3 pages! At this rate I ll need 6 months to study only SE!”

“Me too! I did half a chapter yesterday and got so excited I did so much that I didn’t study anything for the rest of the day!”

————————————————————————————————

“Aren’t you getting scared?!”

“Actually, I m not!!”

“Even me! And that’s scaring me; the fact that I m not getting scared!”

“Oho! Bhaya aagtilla antha bhaya aagtide! Idu olle chennagide!”

“Yaaa!!!”

***********************************************

During exams

***********************************************

“Hey eshtaaythe?”

“Innu I have to do last two units. What about you?”

**That’s it?!! Man! I have DONE 2 units so far!**

“I just started kane! Innu tumba ide madakke”

“Don’t worry! You will do, there s still time. I still have to do so much.”

**Really?!!**

“Ley, you said last chapter!”

“Ya, but I thought I ll do 6^th question as well”

“Huh! 6^th question! Naanilli 100 marks cover maado ashtralle saakagide neen 6^th question antidyalle!”

“Hey nange bhari 100ge madakke bhaya kane adakke!”

**Faint…. Almost**

————————————————————————————————

“Hey how much did you finish?”

“I have no idea! No idea how much I ve done, how much is remaining and no idea if I remember anything I ve done!”

“Me too in the same state!”

————————————————————————————————

“How was it?”

“Okk” “So-so” “Parvagilla” “Not good” “Too bad” “Wrote for 80” “75…”

“Eno I ve written for 90 but I should see how much I ll get”

“Che I had left this one part! Ide barbekitta! Che!”

————————————————————————————————

*****After SE*****

“How was it?”

“I ll pass!” “Yay! Pass aagthini!”

“I hope I pass”

“Abba! Pass aadre saaku”

“Paper was not good… just hoping to pass…”

“SE is over! Its almost as if exams are over!”

————————————————————————————————

*****After CN*****

“How was it?”

“It was too horrible”

“Such a horrible paper” “worst ever”

“What is this? Not a single expected question!”

“Couldn’t even write 3 questions properly”

“I hope I clear this one…”

“I m going to flunk… No, I m telling you… I m going to flunk”

“I ve written for just 50. and I have no idea what-so-ever what all I have written”

“I don’t know what will happen… L L”

————————————————————————————————

*****After the last exam*****

“How was it?”

“Ok” “Good”

“I don’t care, the exams are over!!”

“Abbaa!! Finally! Exams are over!”

“Hey we have completed our 3^rd year of engineering! Just one more to go! Our sixth sem is over!”

“Ah well… not quite! I can never be sure of it until I get my results ”

“Ya! You are right!”

“VTU is going to become malamal!”

“Hows that?”

“They ll make crores from our reval fees for SE and CN!!”

“:D:D:D:D” “Hahaha! So true!”

“Don’t think will get even FCD this time…”

“I don’t care… right now – exams are over! That’s it!”

P.S.:

1. I ve made a collection of these snippets because exams have been revolving around my life (or is it the other way round? Either ways it has the same effect) for the past 3 weeks and all conversations with friends have had repeated usages of the above mentioned lot. So when I came out of my exams and sat to write something all I could think of is these!

2. The language is kept simple because obviously we don’t use big words in our day-to-day conversation.

3. I ve used colloquial language because I felt it would make it more natural.

4. Names of the subjects may not be understandable by one and all. But I don’t think that should affect the reading in anyway

5. To all my college friends – if any of you feel being a part of any of the above conversations then let me tell you – you are

Vague Occurances

“Sir”, a man entered my cube, “The meeting is about to commence”. I nodded my head blankly. My mind was somewhere else. I was thinking about the previous evening when I took her out to Bailey’s. It was 8 years, to be precise, since I had last been to that place. It had been a favorite hang out of Anu and me. We would go there at every given chance…..till she parted with me. 8 years! I thought. The place was still the same. Nothing had changed since then.

 

As I helped her into a chair, she beamed. I knew she was very happy. So was I. It was a while since we had been out. She was at her playful best. She snatched away my cell phone as I got a message to see if it was from a woman. I gave her a stern look, which was only returned with an impish grin coupled with twinkling eyes. Anu! She looked just like Anu! Or so I felt. As the menu card was placed in front of us, she took the charge of ordering everything; for me as well. Typical Anu! Ah! I must stop thinking of her, I thought. “Say something”, she said, “I am bored”. I managed with a smile – “You are very pretty.” No. she was not amused. She had expected something more interesting from me. Instead, she made a start herself; the topic being her day’s happenings. She told me how she had an argument with her friends while trying to prove that I was the best. I was amazed. She loved me so much!

 

As we drove back home, I was still silent, cursing myself for going back to that restaurant I had sweared never to visit again, for I couldn’t help but remember Anu. But wait; did I really not want that? “What’s wrong?” my thoughts were interrupted by her, “Why are you so silent?” “It’s Anu’s birthday today, your mama’s birthday”. “Oh”. She was silent. She had sensed something wrong. Now she knew why – why her dad was so sad, why he wasn’t telling those funny stories he always did. I looked at my little one from the corner of my eye; she was quiet, thinking something hard. I knew exactly what every expression of hers meant. I loved her so much, as much as I loved Anu. And suddenly, she said something that jolted me. “I love you papa, you are the bestest”. I know, it was a nine year old girl, not knowing how to console her dear dad and get him out of this sorrow who said these words, but it meant a lot to me. I couldn’t stop myself from crying. I stopped the car, gave her a tight hug and kissed her. As I drove back, she cuddled up to me telling jokes she had read from her joke book. “Sir”, this time I looked up, “Meeting…?”. “Ah, yes”. I got up to leave, wishing once again, like I have at least a countless number of times, that Anu was still alive.

Jodha-Akbar

 

It’s all over the print media now. Jodhabai wasn’t the WIFE of Akbar instead his daughter-in-law. People are protesting silently all over Rajasthan against the release of the movie Jodha-Akbar which presents them as husband and wife, which according them isn’t true. Instead, Jodha was actually the wife of Salim.

 

 

I was like WHAT?! Could it possible be true? Could such a celebrated film maker like Ashutosh Gowarikar make such a blunder? After all his extensive research on this topic for 3 months in Agra, Lucknow and Rajasthan? I mean, doesn’t it all sound a bit too ridiculous?!! For all I know, even Mughal-e-azam presents Jodhabai as Akbar’s wife and not as Salim’s. Didn’t people raise a question on that? Or may be people weren’t just that crazy during those years!

 

 

Or could it be just-another-pre-release-hype controversy? Considering the kind of stuffs that come on papers before the release of any big-or-small movie these days. If it is so, then I don’t see why this movie needs all this hype. The movie is looking good, the feel and look is authentic (wouldn’t want to comment on the authenticity of the story here, cos considering we Indians, anything can be true! ). Hrithik and Ash (yes her too!) look great as well. Just trying to make a point that no matter what the controversy is, (rather what the truth behind this maze of relationships is) people will watch the movie. I will certainly catch up with the movie!

gaaaaaalipata

I had been to Galipata yesterday. It was kind of a reunion of me and my two friends (in full galipata style). As almost every time I watch any movie, this time too the critic in me came out alive strong and kicking (quite literally) and I thought why not kick start my second blog with my review of the movie? And since I do plan to be a serious film critic one day I thought this would be a good platform to express my views. (so there ll be more such reviews in the future too every time I watch a movie). Anyway right now…over to galipata…

First thing I did not understand is why the movie is called galipata at the first place. Well you may say because they fly kites in the movie but I thought they only flew kites BECAUSE the movie was called galipata. Had it been called doni then they would be making paper boats. Though I think it should ve been called Ganesh because it seriously has an overdose of him. (I mean I like him but I cannot have too much of him.) And to think it’s a multi starrer! The predilection starts from the credits itself – “GOLDEN STAR Ganesh starring”… I still don’t fathom why each actor in Kannada industry is given such corny titles – Rebel Star, Sahasa Simha, Hattrick hero etc etc. Seriously its beyond me. The cameras too seem to have fallen love with him since he is given the maximum screen time, maximum. Again something I don’t understand especially when you have such cute looking Diganth beside! Second thing I really didn’t see was a concept in the movie. What was the director trying to say? Anything at all?

Another thing I don’t understand regarding Kannada movies is the way they flow with the wind. You have one Mungaru Male meeting success, and then you have 20 movies made on the same lines. Seriously a lack of creativity. This movie too is no different (other than the fact that it had the same team). It has Ganesh (well!), shot in beautiful locales (the thing I m least complaining about), has one song by Sonu which at first sounds just like Anisutide. And Ganesh looks like he has come from Mungaru and walked straight into this movie (without a shave and a hair cut that too). I m sure it’s pretty much obvious now that everything about the movie is Ganesh-centric.

Ok, this movie has 3 friends (Dil Chahta Hai with a difference – the difference being the screen time) Ganesh, Diganht and Kitti (Rajesh Krishna). I think the director’s brief to Diganth was just to flash his dimples at the word go and he does it with great panache. (Only wish the camera would focus a little more on him). Kitti is supposed to be a very reserved guy (depressingly reserved) because his girlfriend of 8 years dumped him and he hasn’t come out of it. So in effect both these guys don’t get to speak much which of course it utilized to the core to promote Ganesh’s histrionics.

Over to the actresses (if you really care to call them as actresses that is). Daisy is the only one who looks graceful and matches the scenic beauty. She s a widow so obviously she too cant be speaking much right? Though I wonder why her husband (who apparently dies trying to save a child) was doing by the river side barely two hours after his marriage to her. The only reason I see is he wanted to commit suicide! Then there is Neetu. The director’s brief to her according to me was to “ack-thoo” at anything and everything possible. Now to think a guy actually falls for this man-in-the-making! And that to Diganth! There is not a single scene to project their love blossoming. We are just made to assume that. Screen time you see.

Then, there s the third actress whose name is God-knows-what or rather who-cares-what. So, the director’s brief to her is to act like a 16 year old (cos she is supp to be in her PUC. The first thought that ran across me when I saw her was that if she was in her PU then I must be a toddler! OR, she has flunked way too many times.), which I think she interpreted as 6, and being the fine actor that she is she has performed just like a 6 year old – but mentally retarded. And our bhola bhala Kitti falls for her! AND they get engaged too!

Oh, there is a pig too, the only thing that gets good screen space prolly because it doesn’t have to speak or dance or act. So the director feels the presence of this will in no way harm Ganesh and his star power and hence you can see it every now and then.

Since there HAS to be a true filmy shytle love affair of Ganesh and Daisy’s, with good share of twists and turns, they wind up the other two love stories with each pair given 2 scenes together and a song each. Now its time for our hero who obviously wont win the heroine so easily. There s never too less masala for us which we cannot tolerate. So he proposes, she disposes, he whines, he cries, he swears death and finally gives up all his hopes. Then there is the master stroke – the climax. Ok, agreed its well shot, but how many times is what I ask? How many times should the heroine fall into the river which has dangerous, life taking falls and rocks everywhere and the hero save her? Have we not had enough of it?

Ok, I have so far sounded very critical of the movie but I must admit despite all this the movie is still worth a watch. Yes, it does disappoint, because we go to the theartre expecting the movie to be different, to reach new levels, beyond Mungaru and other movies in the same league, but it is still entertaining. Ganesh hams, but there are certain things he is best at, and he shows it. The highlight is obviously the scenic beauty. Amazingly captured. The songs too, may not be the best, but are good (though the choreography lets you down). The best part of the movie is the comedy. Esp scenes where Ganesh treats Diganth as their younger sister and treat him like a baby (abba, anthu inthu nam tangi madve settle aaythu and things like that). And comedy being his forte, Ganesh scores in it.

I say its worth a watch also because I have seen a whole lot of hindi movies paying more than double what I paid for this movie and coming out of the theatre-look-alike-concentration-camp thanking god for still keeping me alive despite having surrendered my life carelessly at the hands of the actors who heat it, beat it, churn it, tear it and finally throw it back at my face while I look hopelessly at it.

An experience of its kind

This blog is a diary of sorts of my recent trip to mysore. It was a memorable experience because this was an actual “TRIP” and not the usual roaming around we do every hols. I wont throw much light into describing the places – you can find it elsewhere.

 

It all began during our sem exams when me Danya and Swathy decided that we go to Swathy’s native Chitradurga during hols. The first big thing was to convince Danya’s parents and I as usual was vested upon with this strenuous task because Danya (and some part of me too) believes that her parents trust me more than her! It didn’t take much time though to convince them that we were not going to run away but return home safe and sound. Great. Next the plan was formulated and well, so much like a fairy tale that I knew by my instincts that something would go wrong and it did!! The trip was canceled. Devastating. But since we had spent too much of time and energy in convincing our parents into letting us go on our own I decided why not my native – Mysore? And mysore being my native and my favorite city I have been there at least a thousand times. But owing to my relatives I never had got a chance to visit those monumental places the city is known for (barring the temples of course - those are the places my parents would never hesitate to take me over and over again much to my distress).

 

So, this time I wanted to visit all those places and not my relatives. Talking of my instincts I knew this trip would succeed as it went through many odds. First it was my 6 mega pixel digicam giving away and we had to make up with another 4 mp cam with just 16 mb (that means less pictures – something I dread the most owing to my interest in photography). Next it was Danya who fell sick just hours before we were to leave and she falling sick is a very BIG deal! It needs immense talent to take care of her in such a situation, an art perfected only by her mom. But I must confess I admire her enthusiasm to be with us and enjoy that she got better and how! The thing which completely brought down my enthusiasm to minuscule levels was Danya’s father approving of a trip to her native Sringeri – a place I have been vying to go for quite sometime. (we didn’t even think of asking her parents for this fearing a big NO!). Now this was a complete shocker. I mean its such a rarity that her dad agrees that meteoroid collision to earth would sound more frequent! (no exaggeration here - I am sure Danya will agree with this!)

 

Anyway barring all odds our trip finally turned into a reality as the train starting moving towards our first point of destination – Srirangapatna, historical town. (I am just quoting what the big banners on the Mysore-Bangalore road boast of the city – infact all the cities en route). Now, you are a tourist (quite obviously, with luggage in your hands) and a group of three and on top of it all three are girls then you are bound to turn an attraction yourself – attraction of auto drivers who very well know they are needed! We too were attacked by one such guy who followed us all the way to Ranganathaswamy temple and Col. Bailey’s Dungeon (which apparently was a jail at one time) despite our numerous no’s and nah’s and go-away’s. Until of course Danya got into her quintessential best and yelled royally at him that might have scared the Britishers had she been born then!

 

But we did need an auto and quickly found one too after much bargaining from my side. He seemed to be pretty good and showed us all the places well telling stories related to each place all along the way (Swathy didn’t understand most of them though!). Anyway, we went to water gate (there is nothing to see there), Jamia Masjid (again nothing to see), Tipu’s death place, Dariya Daulat (Tipu’s summer palace – now a museum that has many paintings and pictures depicting that era), Gumbaz (also called Tipu’s tomb – it houses Hyder Ali’s, Tipu’s amd his mother’s tomb), Kaveri sangama and finally to bus stand. On the whole it was a nice experience. Next we headed towards mysore.

 

Our first place of visit once we entered Mysore was the majestic Mysore Palace – a place I admire the most, a place I always wanted to visit even as a kid but never got a chance and the place where my mom studied for three years (yes people, she did her 7, 8, 9 classes with the King’s daughters!). Though I did say I will not throw much light upon the places but this one place is worth mentioning. Standing magnificently bright and large it takes everybody in complete awe. But for us it was more than awe – it was jealousy. We for once wished we were born to or married into the Wodeyars! Or atleast had a chance like my mom had to study there, play with the prince and the princesses (prince I mean Srikantadatta), stroll around the palace and oh not to forget the pick and drop service offered in the Maharaja’s car! The durbar hall, the glass art, the paintings on the walls, the pillars, the wooden carved doors everything – everything about the palace mesmerized us!

 

One of my fondest memories of Mysore as a young girl was the tongas which once was a mode of transport but now even that is a tourist attraction! I loved traveling on a tonga and never missed a chance and this time too I wanted to travel as for any short distance didn’t matter and relive those memories. So we took a tonga to my aunt’s place to rest for sometime and then headed in the evening towards St. Phelomena’s Church – again beautifully built architecture both on the inside and outside. We ended our day by having dinner at – again one of my fondest hotels as a kid – Siddharta.

 

My next day typically began with scaring a poor Swathy at a dark 6 o clock in the morning by switching to her bed while she was away (well that’s just me). But it actually started with me and Swathy boiling water for bath in old style hande using kerosene and dry coconut shells. It was kinda fun – again a first experience. Once fresh we headed towards Chamundi Betta by bus (yes we decided to avoid autos after we counted our first day’s expenses!). Again it was an experience as I almost got my brother married to a fellow passenger’s daughter who insisted he would find the perfect bride for him if I gave my address to him. Oh, by the way, his daughter is in ‘software’ (whatever that implies!) and earns 30000 and he has got his SEVEN sisters married so he has a reputation at it! My next few minutes at the temple were spent in avoiding that guy who otherwise I am sure was determined to get grooms for all three of us! (though I don’t think the other two would have minded that!)

 

Next we went to karanji kere – a place I never knew existed until the famous koorakkuknalli kere song. It was an overwhelming experience. The bird park is worth more than a mention. So many beautiful birds walking so carelessly in and around you looking the least scared and way too happy to pose for all the snaps that you would want to take them home! Peacocks, white peacocks, ducks, cranes, hens – all so lovely. Then there is something called the Butterfly Park. You are made to walk about one and a half kilometers, walking past all the couples “kuchikoo-ing” with each other, then you stand in a place where all your inner fears of having got lost come strikingly alive and in a split second, without any warning there is a firework – firework of butterflies flying all around you and all you do is stand there awe-struck! It really was amazing.

 

Mysore zoo – one of India’s largest zoos, hosting a wide range of animals (most of which were asleep by the time we went) – was our next destination. In the evening we went to KRS.

 

It is always advisable to go to KRS in your own vehicle unless you are used to traveling in those raging private buses and fighting with those auto drivers (yes, here too!). KRS dam, Brindavan Gardens, the various fountains, musical fountain everything was mind boggling.

 

On the last day we went to Jaganmohan Palace. If you are a first timer you might easily get muddled by the posters of politicians and retail shops. It looks nothing like a palace and the entrance for the art gallery is also at an invisible place. Once inside you will see a number of paintings (including those of revered Ravi Varma) and various other artifacts, of course the most famous Clock (which sadly was out of order when we went).

 

All we did from there with whatever little energy we had was to rush to the suburb bus stop to catch a bus to Bangalore. It was possibly the end of the trip for all of us. But for me it was much more. I always knew I loved this city and belonged to it, now I knew the city a lot better.